Untitled:
For sale:
Fox tail
Never used
A Short Poem
I wonder if Jesus ever got hayfever
If Jesus was poorly made
It's natural when you make me go to hospital
Because you made my heart sneeze
You didn't do anything wrong
I am just poorly made
A Crush Poem
Olivia Rodrigo straddling a bass guitar
In some vajazzled wet dream
I never knew I liked your guts this much
Until I got fucked up in the garden WWE
I am a little gay and pathetic
My stupid tattoo scraped off on the concrete
I thought you’d find that cute
You being a pop star and me
Being nobody
Is hard but worth it, Olivia
Something Spikier
Why does love mean love?
It should be a different word
Girlfriend:
Every night I hope to fucking God
You place 9th in Mario Kart
8th is fine I guess
But 9th and any worse even better last place
That's how I know you’re the best girlfriend in the world
Just before I finally fall to sleep
I think about you picking the cutest Super Smash Bros
character Spamming every button and getting real fucking lucky
And beating me at my own game
When I say Insaniqaurium
You say what?
I say it's a fish tank simulator with monsters
I’ve literally spent 208 hours on this game
You couldn't care less
You have no earthly idea how to be a boy
I love you so much
If I Had Cancer
I wouldn’t die
I would lick it
If someone else had cancer
It would be delicious
But lately
I haven’t been hungry
Everything tastes like shit
Because I love you too much
It makes me sick
And it’s too early to eat
You don’t deserve this
Casper Kelly is a writer living in the United Kingdom. He only comes out at night. Instagram: @paris_texaco
High Horse 